Love Free or Die - Installation 2 (read the screen shots)

An account of true love, out of frame and with some context

Parenting

We left this story in the last post at, Tripp and I were chatting about the future right before he blocked me. He was posting opinions about parenting. I responded and then told him he was going to have my babies. He liked it. Then he asked me what I wanted from him. Looking back now, it seems like he wanted me to say more to him and not less, and that’s my bad.

When he blocked, there were questions and a fantasy.

Playing it cool has an upside - you don’t want to put too much pressure on someone that isn’t serious and you want to be enticing.

It’s also a shit strategy if you break someone by not loving them enough.

It seemed like things were about to be real. When he blocked, it was a shock and a day dream…

At first, my time was spent speculating on why he would block me.. This wasn’t the first time a man that had expressed interest in me for a *significant* length of time then randomly, and for no reason, blocked me. In fact, I asked Tripp not to do this in one of our last DMs. And then he did it anyway.

First Scott Nolan wouldn’t talk to me directly, (only using alternative methods to be shown later) - even though we clearly had tons of chemistry that developed into a very deep relationship. Then Zack would barely be around me. Then Chris flew into Park City, had a great time with me, talked to me about kids and life style at dinner - even brought the kids subject up again after we had dropped it. Then he stopped when things started to get serious physically that night (we were naked in his bed and we didn’t fuck.) And then blocked for no reason.

Then Tripp did the same thing.

This pattern always goes back to Scott Nolan, and Founders Fund (FF)

Founders Fund (FF) is a venture capital fund that interviewed me for years. It is the flagship fund started by Peter Thiel, CoFounder of Paypal and Author of Zero to One. Many of the former and current partners also know me socially. The first time I spoke to Scott Nolan was at Peter’s house. Chris had been in VC but he wasn’t besties with ppl at Founders Fund OR working high level at one of their portfolio companies until several years after we met/casually dated. Scott and I had a full blown romance using Pinterest, even though he wouldn’t DM or text me, (I thought bc there was career overlap), until he got married to someone else.

The most pressure I put on Scott to communicate with me directly and not on pinterest etc was calling him out on twitter a few times, with a song about being a man. Sort of.

Anyway, I call them out for taunting me in DM with Chris on insta, then Tripp executes on the same thing months later. Tripp had nothing to do with Founders Fund, Scott Nolan, or even Venture Capital when we met. He also knew about my issues with Chris and FF, had talked to me about it in DM and on the twitter timeline. It wasn’t random, it was intentional. It just took a while for me to believe for sure that Tripp’s intention wasn’t to cause harm, but to help me with proof that this has been happening, to get me the fuck out of it.

What does this mean?

Before we start speculating on the implications of this or the reasons for it.. (in part likely because Scott Nolan has power and access to lots of technology, and is possessive/ mad that his reputation became tangled in a romance outside of his marriage) (also maybe about gov’t shit /skills I have and won’t share) - Let’s talk about the communication. Scott was the first person to communicate with me like this. We used pinterest. There is almost no record of it. At first my understanding was that we were getting to know each other privately, because getting hired at Founders Fund would look a little weird if we were dating during the interview process. High level jobs in VC *can* take years to lock into. There aren’t many positions available, and it is very reputation and relationship driven. Needless to say, it was also my intention to protect my career and credibility, which is why I posted about Scott on twitter and wrote a blog post on medium.. That way, no one would have to question my intentions or what happened behind closed doors.

This ended (sort of) when after years of asking him to make our relationship public, he told me he was married. A month after his wedding. The pinterest continued until he merged a board with his then wife.

It sucked. And then I moved on.

And then I couldn’t date anyone without the same thing happening. If Scott says he doesn’t know me, ask him what his dick looks like. He told me it’s shaped like a hook (that’s actually his name for it as well, because it’s how he “catches all the fish”.) There are def other pieces of info I could offer for proof here - but let’s not dox and save it for a later conversation.

Follow me down the Rabbit Hole…

This begins a discussion of measuring communication outside of normal frames and tradition.

Tripp and I were about to explore a deeper relationship and it stopped short in DM. But we didn’t actually halt everything after that.